Stationery designer Melissa Cobbs’ vintage postcard save-the-date, on Etsy.
It’s a question as old as—well, as old as destination weddings. When do you send the postcards (or refrigerator magnets, or luggage tags) that ask guests to set aside a weekend to help you celebrate? The impulse may be to get them in the mail the minute you’ve got a date and a place, but not so fast. Here, five do’s and don’ts:
1. Do make sure your plans are set in stone. You need the dates (the timeframe for all activities–i.e. August 15 through 18) and the specific place, so guests can make travel arrangements.
2. Don’t send them to anyone you’re not certain about. Mail them to your VIPs, of course (family, bridal party, BFFs), but if you’re waffling as to whether or not to invite that cute couple from the organic coop, wait. Once a save-the-date is sent, there’s no going back. And be clear whether the invitation is for an entire family, an individual with a date, etc.
3. Do wait until about eight months before the wedding to send the save-the-dates. Any earlier and they make end up at the bottom of piles.
4. Don’t send electronic save-the-dates to guests who aren’t computer literate. You don’t have to order separate paper STDs; a phone call will be fine.
5. Do send an invitation to anyone on the save-the-date list who has indicated she won’t be able to make it. Plans change, tight budgets can be massaged—someone who says “I don’t think so” in January may be ready to party by August.
